Checking things out...

I had a tough time sleeping. I'd turn the lights out and the room would start spinning and I lied on my bed. Then I'd move from one position to another and it would start moving for another 10 - 15 seconds. To the point where if it lasted ongoing I'd be getting sick. At one point I had to turn the TV on and sleep with the light coming off the TV because that seemed to help with the dizziness, seeing light. 

When I woke up I jumped into my Triathlon Toons and AG work. I wanted to get my brain running. It wasn't easy I was very unmotivated and melancholy. I was able to get a lot done. I also booked two appointments for today, one for my calf with a physiotherapist at 11:20 am and one with my doctor at 3 pm to look at my concussion. 

Both meetings went well. The physiotherapist found my stress, it was a very ropey calf strain that was deep in my upper calf. She thought it was the area where the muscle attaches to the ligament or bone. She said the good news was I didn't tear anything. It had already been feeling better with the rest I was giving it and I went to the physiotherapist for some final accelerated healing with the ultra sound or acupuncture. I got ultrasound and massage today. When she started it was so deep, by the time she was done it was up near the surface and tender. She's thinking I may be able to go for a 3 - 5 mile light, light jog later this week. 

I went back home and did some work. Then I got over to Dr. Hack's office. He's a young but excellent doctor. He had a young medical student working with him and she did my initial assessment. When she came in just by herself I asked "Where's Hack?" concerned. She said he'll be coming to see me. Whew. 

The girl did a series of tests, like follow my finger and and feeling my jaw and collar bone and other stuff I can't even remember. She then returned with Hack and he didn't feel that I was in any major danger to train so long as I don't mind training with dizziness. I got the impression that he felt it was a mild concussion and because I don't have muscle issues, perhaps one arm much weaker than the other, that I'm okay, it could be worse. 

They also asked if I was having trouble breathing, which I wasn't. However, I did feel like an air pocket in my left shoulder blade area. 

While I was there Hack asked me if I've been bulking up. I said no, I did say that since Sunday I've probably put on 10 lbs. I can feel it and see it in the mirror. Last Saturday at the pool, I had no gut and no love handles, now I have a big gut and love handles and my face is rounded. I asked him if the concussion could cause this, he didn't seem to think so. I also said maybe it was the beer, after wards I thought maybe it was the hammer tissue rejuvenator. 

Either way I'm definitely up big time in weight, my shirts are tighter. One Ironman pullover which is my loosest was feeling tight. I don't want to dwell on the past, Alice tells me I do it to much time, but that drinking of beer on Saturday was a big mistake. It's hurt me physically and mentally.

Mentally I'm down, Alice has noticed it and commented on it. It appears to me that my brain chemistry has been affected. It was something I didn't foresee. I'd been training consistently and my medication was consistent, when I have beer it throws it off. Normally it's not an issue because I train the next day and it gets rid of those down feelings. Right now I haven't been able to train. That, combined with a head injury is really recking havoc with my mind. 

If this moment in time doesn't get me to stop drinking I don't know what will. I really don't like the place I'm in right now. For the past 6 weeks I've been feeling great.

Today I picked my new Virtual Assistant from India. I interviewed two on the phone. I have been having some problems with my website after letting the one guy go. I'm not sure if it's a coincidence or him. They assure me it's a coincidence. I picked my guy named Sashant, or Abbey two. His English was excellent and he seemed very respectful and his manager also recommended him out of the two. 

I spent a lot of time with Poochie's team leaders as well, getting more detail of the plan and learning some new things as I go along. The main problem is even though these guys know English well they don't all ways communicate well. Something that after learnt I could explain in 2 minutes takes them10 minutes of me constantly asking questions or saying I don't understand. 

Tonight I was feeling crappy and fought internally if I should go to the pool. I wanted to and didn't. I had no excuse now, doctor said I was okay and physio said my calf is near healing this week. The biggest problem was I was depressed and down. Eventually I went. It wasn't easy. 

When I got there I figured I'd go as long as I could. When I undressed I got discussed looking in the mirror. I was much fatter than my last swim. I don't know how I did it but I easily gained 10 lbs. The mirror doesn't lie. I got in the pool and was swimming slow. I had no power or strength. I felt like a whale pulling himself through the water. It also felt similar to swimming hungover, my head was a little cloudy and dizzy. I ended up bailing at 30 minutes. It helped a little get my mind clearer, not much. 

Since getting home from the doctors office, for a couple hours I slept upstairs on my bed. I'm still dizzy, the headaches are about 50% of what they were yesterday and the jaw was about 70% better. I could now move my jaw without pain. All I've been doing is sleeping. 

Today I did have a major win. I ate the best I've ever eaten, less calories than I can ever remember eating in a long time. I only have about 3 weeks to Vegas and the only thing I can control with will power is my eating. Now I just need to string that together for 3 weeks. 

Tonight was a better sleep. Spinning, but a little shorter. I did take an Advil before bed for my headache. For two days now I've had a headache. Today was 50% better than yesterday. I also had a short bath before bed, not to long, I didn't want to dehydrate myself too much. 

I've got to say, I feel I've set myself back 3 - 4 weeks in training. I can't remember feeling this terrible in a long time, it's been so long I can't remember it. I do remember the last time I got a concussion, I was probably 5 years old and riding my bike around the neighbourhood and took a wicked corner and wiped out hitting my head. I had my eyes open and couldn't see anything and my mom took me to the hospital. The one thing Hack said is now that I have got a concussion I'll be more susceptible to getting more. 

Easy Swim - 30:09 / 1286 meters

1287 Calories